Hi friends,

I disappeared from the Urban Zone platforms and Urban Terror game a few weeks ago. Completely unannounced, and I have learned that it came as a shock to many people. I would like to explain a little bit further.

www.urtphoenixclan.com...?f=5&t=288

I have made many friends through the game and through the competition, and I will forever be grateful for that. I wish you all the best, and hope you keep fragging and do the community proud.

Goodbye.
Doornroosje
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Hey doorn,

Best of luck with life, we'll keep the candle burning and keep urt alive for another decade for when you are ready to come back. It's not a weakness to come back, many have done it before and many will in the future. This game gets under your skin, sometimes too much which might cause people to undertake the same steps you have.

Take care.
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Hey bro. I have read your whole comment in the Phoenix website.

Listen, I know what it's like to live with depression. Been living with it since I was 10 years old. I'm 16 now, so it's been 6 years. I suppose this is a different reason from you though, because, mine was just because of puberty.
I developed my mind and my maturity alot earlier than I was supposed to and I could not get my correct thoughts into actions which led me to hate myself. I did things I'm not proud of and had to pass through hell. There were even times where I didn't think I'd have a future. I still live with this condition. I basically have a problem on which I have to skip school. I just have to. I get so anxious and everything that I get panic attacks everytime I remember myself of that bunch of immature sly bastards they call "my friends". Anyway, court got envolved, and sooner or later they will be forcing me real hard to get to school. I've heard it 1000 times though "you need to go to school if you want a future. if you want to get a job blabla.." and basically I don't really care. I never had a childhood eventhough I had everything I could ever ask for. That did not necessarily mean that I was always happy. It was 6 years in a row without having 1 day where I was happy. I had absolutely nothing. No friends, no family to care about me, no girlfriend, nothing. I had to live on my own and sometimes I even had to search for stories like my own on the internet to make me feel that I wasn't alone. It's really a bummer when this happens. Anyway, at the moment as i've said i'm 16, and yeah, i'm still skipping schol eventhough I'm recovering from everything, I do have a normal life atm and i'm happy I didn't do anything I would regret in those years. Just remember, you can chose the life you want to have, but you cannot change the rules. I would have had so much pottential to become a real someone one day, and this is going to leave a mark for the rest of my life. But it's not like I can change it, i'm living for the moment.
Psychological disorders are really underrated. People cannot and will not understand unless they've been there themselves. I even hate to say it's a disorder. It makes us look like we're mental people, even though we're not. People that suffer from depressions are actually the most sentimental kind of people, the ones with a true heart. Because they've got a conscience. So yeah, you've got alot to take pride on, especially on who you are. You have a great personality and you just have to wait and see. I just promise things will get better.

Keep it strong and a hug to you bro, I hope you get better soon and I hope to see you in a few years if i'm still around

There's never been a good relationship between us, but I hope you get better soon.

Enjoy life cause we just get one

and merry xmas

Like i wrote on the phoenixforums, i hope you get well, and if there's ever anything or you need someone to talk to you, you know I'm here.
Merry xmas, en wordt snel beter, owls is anders zonder je man!

bai

Well i guess i can be the person to sit here and say that things between myself and yourself have never been worse, i don't hate you, but im sure you hated me. But i look at that in the sense of 'that's life'.

No matter what i wouldn't wish what you're going through onto anyone, no matter how much i hated them... With all respect in the world i hope you get better and i hope i get to see you again in the future.

I'm going to miss you Doornroosje.
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IS IT WRONG TO BE STRONG?